Welcome to The Party

Here are the rules of engagement:

1. Cake Is Sacred.
If it enters the room, it gets honored.
We sing to it. We photograph it. We cut it like it’s a ritual.
No smushing without consent. Frosting is holy.

2. Trust the Room.
What happens under the lights stays under the lights.
This is a sanctuary for speeches that wobble, kisses that surprise, and dance moves that should never see daylight.
No posting without permission. Protect the magic.

3. Respect the Humans.
Every guest is VIP.
Consent is sexy.
Aggressive weirdness is not.
If someone says “nah,” you pivot like a pro and grab another drink.

4. You Are the Staff.
This is autonomous access, baby.
You run the bar. You spin the decks. You hold the mic.
Don’t trash the place like a touring rock band in ’77.
There’s a cleaning fee — but dignity is free.

5. BYOB Means Be Your Own Bartender (and Adult).
Bring what you love.
Pour responsibly.
Hydrate like a champion.
Nobody wants to carry you down the stairs at 2am in heels.

6. Leave It Better Than You Found It.
Wipe the bar. Bag the trash.
Treat the stripper pole like a respected piece of architecture.
This room runs on mutual respect and minimal friction.

7. Love Loud. Exit Softly.
Sing too hard.
Toast too long.
Then gather your people, collect your dignity, and float back into the New York night like the glittering legend you are.

This is Cakes.
A room built on fun, trust, and respect.
If you can’t handle that — there’s always somewhere boring.